Getting prepared to say goodbye uterus

I found out last week I have to have a hysterectomy no more putting it off. Yes I am young darn it (or I like it when someone says that anyway). I am 31 just in case you wanted to know, but doesnt matter have to say goodbye to the uterus and cervix.

Also found out cant do the laporscopic way (no that would be too easy) no outpatient surgery for me. I will go in on the 10th and have the surgery and hopefully be home and on lots of drugs by the 13th. They have to open up my already abused csection scar.

So being the perpetual planner that I am the fact that I will be down probably 2 weeks (I say 1-2 they say 6-8) I am in panic mode. I have cleaned 3 out of 4 of the main closets (because you know that has to be done before I am down). I know I am a nuerotic mess when it comes to having things organized. I have already ordred valentines gifts for teachers and my kids to be delievered to the school. I have started a massive list of things I can do from my bed when I am home and suppose to be in said bed.

Next on the list call Cox Cable and tell them if they have another internet snafu like they did this last week which resulted in no internet for 4 days then they better send a straight jacket for me because otherwise I will come find them even if I am hooked to a cathater and/or major pain meds.

Two weeks from tommorow and so much to get done!

Why does everyone ask me?

I do paralegal work, I have done it for years, got my certification years ago. I sometimes think if I knew how many people would ask me legal questions (instead of forking over the cost of a lawyer consult) I might have changed my mind. I do freelance work for several attorneys and am in the process of adding a few things where I can do more homebased work. Anyway, because I do have some legal knowledge it apparently makes me free target. That added with the fact that I have an my inability to say no to people (my hubby says I don't have a problem saying no to him so I should work on it with other people...hahaha).

This week is one of those weeks, a friend of mine who has a daughter in a wheelchair got sued for a medical bill, well it was not a justified lawsuit and I know they can't afford a lawyer so I did a few letters and took care of it. I was not even done with doing that and the neighbor across the street, whom I just think the world of is having a problem....so I spend about 5 hours this week trying to help them. Friends ask me to do things but actually this week helping both with such big issues is rare.

Family on the other hand drives me insane. Without going into too much detail my brother has been in and out of trouble since he was 15. Big trouble at times little trouble at most others. My parents constantly bail him out (figuratively and literally). It is a spot of contention for me. Last night I get a call he has lost his drivers license again. He probably doesn't need one anyway since he has had two wrecks in a week in my dad's new truck (which dad should no better than to loan him, but hey I am just the daughter what do I know). But low and behold my mom the queen of guilt calls and wants me to appeal the license suspension. UGH...if I do it I feel like I am bailing my brother out which I don't think he needs, if I don't do it then I guilt the mom supreme guilt trip.

I told hubby last night I don't want to be a paralegal anymore, give me a part time job where no one has any interest in what I do that I can still do from home, and in no way can what I do be of service to them. Does that sound selfish? I am really not a selfish person but I feel that Matt and I have so much going on with Braden's health and Brittney, school, PTA, just making our own ends meet, getting our own time together, so and on and so forth that all this "help" people are asking for is pulling me in too many directions. I know I should just say no, but if you knew me you would know that is probably the hardest thing in the world for me. I hate to disappoint, I hate to let down, I hate not to help.

So I guess I will do like I did this morning get up at 4:30 am to add some more time to the day. Of course I probably could have done some of my to do list in the time that I have blogged but as I commented in another blog this morning, it is much more fun to blog.

Trying to get healthier

I think the universe is against me. I really do. I am trying to get my family healthier and at every turn it seems something is trying to thwart it.

Eating healthier...well one the cost of organic food...wow..much higher...but okay we can suck it up and save in other areas so I buy the organic food. Preparation...ugh not near the convenience of that stuff that clogs our arteries and slows brain function. So trying to prepare menus ahead of time. Looking at the ingredients a 30 minute trip to WalMart can now take over an hour...as there are all kinds of different names for ingredients such as MSG we know that is a bad ingredient but did you know if it has less than a 98.8 % concentration they can call it Natural Flavoring. I don't know about you but if I see the word natural I am thinking its a good thing....well no it isn't. As MSG slows your brain functions and this is especially critical with Braden so have to watch for the Natural Flavoring and let me tell you it is hard pressing to find something without Natural Flavoring. So at least if I can find it at the end of the ingredient list that is a little better.

Then there is the McDonalds factor...my kids want it my kids love it, other moms let their kids eat it. So okay for a treat we will once every 2 weeks...I can bend after all they are kids.

Then the exercise just when I get on a roll, I get a headache, whatever machine I am working on breaks, something much more fun comes along I would rather do. The kids I will get them riding their bikes and then it turns cold, video games are so much more fun than exercise.

So getting healthier takes a lot more than just saying okay we are getting healthier. It takes planning, and lots of coming up with ways to make it fun.

This is the goal and I am committed not just for my son who really needed to be off several of the ingredients in some foods, but for all of us. My husband and I are now both in our 30's (even though he is more into them than me...lol...by 3 years) and we need to be thinking about being healthy. I see kids so overweight and teased and miserable I don't want that for my kids and I think by instilling the good habits now we are ahead of the game.

New perspective

This week I am filling in for a friend and running the office at my friend's law practice. I normally do freelance paralegal work and bill approximately 20-30 hours a week. This week I am putting in 30-40 hours in office. Let me tell you though it is really taking a lot out of me. Only a few more hours, but the fact is when I am billing I can do the work anytime, 3am cant sleep type a demand letter, 2pm have twenty minutes before getting kids dictate a complaint...you get the idea. But this week I have to be there certain hours and do things on that time frame. Add on top of this the juggling of kids, hubby, house, PTA and other projects and you have one tired juggler!

I am always very thankful for the things in my life, but after this week I am even more thankful for the flexibility of my normal work schedule.

A different kind of busy

This week is a different week for me as I am working in the law office basically full time hours. Normally I do freelance paralegal work that keeps me busy but I can do it from home and at 4am if I need to. This week however a very good lawyer friend of mine and his secretary also a good friend needed in office help as the secretary is out for gallbladder surgery. So with the help of hubby we have juggled kids, doctors appts, etc., so that I could be in the office quite a bit this office and at least open the office for them each morning. Yesterday I was there all day, well normally all I do is personal injury paralegal work I work for several different attorneys and this is my specialty...well yesterday I did a little of everything family law, criminal and just being at the office all day it wore me out. I am used to running here and there and having Braden at two different places during the day and so on, but I was so wore out last night. I think a lot of it is that I had to put up with the attorney one on one for a long period of time and usually I dont have to do that. I like him he has always been a good boss, but dealing with him when I am the one that actually knows more than him as it is on the personal injury cases and dealing with him when he expects me to know it all are two different things. I have not done criminal paralegal work in 8 years since I worked a regular paralegal job so it is taking some getting used to. So this week will prove to be busy and a little different.

Tommorow Braden goes to the eye doctor so we will see what they say. He is actually going to go into work with me for a little bit in the morning before the appointment. Luckily the attorney doesnt care and Braden can watch tv and play his game boy.

New Years Resolutions

That time of year again and since I have insomnia tonight and have been up since 3:15 thought I would share mine.

1. Healthier eating and not just for me but for hubby and kids too.
2. Devotional time more with the kids, myself and hubby.
3. Say no more often to all those can you do this or do that.
4. Say yes more often to special little moments with hubby.
5. Excercise all of us I want the kids to start off on the right foot too and never have to struggle to start an excercise program.

Kelli